Monday, February 26, 2007

A lame ThunderBolt

Not really lame I guess If yer Deadpool or sumthin'. The guy in question is the Taskmaster.

His power is he can copy any kind of movements a person does. Like karate kicks, and stuff. So He can pretty much do all the stuff that Daredevil. Hawkeye, Capitan America, and others can do.

And he has the misfortune to fight me.

Everyone should pretty much know what my powers are by now, but in case yer livin' under a rock or somethin. I guess I'll tell ya. I'm strong real strong. Madder I get stronger I become.

I heal fast. Even faster than Wolverine. Also I'm pretty hard to hurt. I won't even go itna the ghost seein' thing. Ok so I tracked him down to his lair . Took down his cannon fodder students.

And we begun fightin'. Well Ya can't really call it a fight. he jumped me, used a bunch of chop saki moves. And he smacked in the face with his shield. Though he used moves from Captian America the shield was made of aluminum or something and dented on my face.

I knocked him out by hittin' him with my middle finger. Yup that was it all there was too it. A pretty easy night's work. It took about fifteen minutes . I think I'll spend the rest of the night in some casinos do some recreational gambling with the money I made.

I hope the next One I fight gives a challenge. Some mook named Venom.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Strikin' back at Deathstrike.

I gotta tip that she's hooked up with the Hand. Whelp I'm goin' there by plane in a route that's night the whole way So I don't have to worry about, changin' to Banner.

After the plane lands I get ta work, finally findin' The Hand Temple after a couple O' hours. And guess who I find inside? Yup Deathstrike.

" Who are what are you? what do you want?" She asks.

" Name's Joe Fixit ,girl. You gotta jail sentence waitn' for ya stateside."

" It will keep on waiting Gajin!" She screeches, slashin' through my chest.

" Aw man Another shirt one!" I say "Oh well I can buy another one offa the bounty for you!"

She cuts me a few more times. I knock her away an' start throwin' things at her.

" Ya can't slash me from far off ! But I can use my power at long range!"

She starts laughing. " You don't study up on your targets do you behemoth?" Her arms stretch out an' go through my guts. Damn adamantium. I grab her arms and Pull 'im outta my chest.

Then I slam her into a pillar she's nice and knocked out. Then a buncha ninjas jump me. Ninjas against me ? Yeah right! I rub them offa me , like bugs. All those swords, knives, and sticks, just annoyed me.

Then some chick In red threatens me.

" I am Elektra leader of the Hand. Leave now Creature, and you can leave with your life!"

I smile " Don't know who ya talkin' to do ya hon?"

" No. Apparently neither do you. Or you would know the Hand is allied with dark forces. This thing appears from no where a weird lookin' demon. It shots me with some kinda Hand blast thing that makes me feel all cold inside .

It then drags me into the shadows

Elektra laughs as the creature does Telling Fixit what it's going to do him, and his soul. Her joy turns to confusion , as the Monster starts screaming. She's horrified when it comes limping out then returns to the smoke from whence it came.

" How No one is that strong..."

I come out of there healin' from the demon damage. " I am I'm the strongest one there is."

The girl's eyes go wide as she realizes just who I am. " I-impossible." She mumbles. Deathstrike who just recovered tries to rip me again.

" What I can't cut you?" She exclaims. " But I did so a while a go."

I grin." I'm madder now. " I knock her out with my index finger.

Girl in red tries to sound threatening again." You may have won this time!But You have made powerful enemies, even more powerful than the monster you pretend to be!"

" Yeah yeah I heard that before Lady!" I turn an' all of them but Death strike are gone. well. I take Deathstrike to the local SHIELD office. I get my money,an' head for home.

Yup, 'm gonna be celebratin' with this money. I'll even invite Kristy to make up for missin' this wedding thing.

Friday, February 02, 2007

I gotta hole in my wall

I've been livin' by myself here fer some time , and I ain't gotta hole in my wall from myself or the normal fightin' I do. but Ya know I let Vegeta , and that runt Logan stay here durin' the their time In Vegas the race.

That was a mistake that caused the aforementioned hole in my freakin' wall. Looks like that whore Draculina sent the Trunk Boys after me. Ya wanna know what's up between us?

Well ok. Ya see The Vegas PD every once in a while pays me when a super powered threat shows up. Well I could never prove it but She was drainin' patrons at that skin bar of their blood.

Not that I really need legal authorization to take her out. Which I did . Problem is with those damned Draculonains they keep comin' back. ( I mean Vlad And your sister Vampi yer alright.)

Well from what I hear Vegeta beat his kids, and sent ' em home. I wouldn't know since this happened during the day. I had Banner on so many sedatives that ww3 couldn't wake him up.

Hey he knew the rules quit tryin' ta cure himself , and he gets freedom. Well he violated ' em and now I don't let 'im have freedom. Well I here Wolverine was useless as usual. The runt slept 'till noon.

So I get vegeta ta pay me back by helpin' take down the last of the Thunder bolts after he gets outta the race.