A new Hulk

Stupid Banner makin' me refuse takin the Bruce Cain job. Eh then again it probably fer the best since Vampi's wuz hurtin' and it all turned out alright. But still work has been a little slow lately since the whole World War Hulk thing.

Take over one city and beat up the Illuminati and people get all pissy. Now you people enjoyed those gladiator games as much as I did, and come on I beat the Sentry for crap's sake! That punk's been needing someone to take him down a peg for some time now.

Any way never mind all that. I hear there's a pretender runnin' around callin' himself the Hulk. A red Hulk who ain't Banner, I mean me.

Look Red why don't cha get your own name huh? Because there is only one Incredible Hulk. An' ya ain't him! Ya don't wanna see how i deal wit' copyright infringement. i don't call lawyers I smash! So ya better hope I don't catch ya!


Stupid fake!

Fightin' Along side Wolverine.

So I found leapin' around like an idiot didn't find Wenidgo at all. And I guess ed If it was after Wolverine since it wasn't comin' after me. So I did what What most people do in a jam, I went inta an Internet cafe, and googled Logan's many names.


Seems A James Logan has a cabin out in Alberta, And there's been reports of a short hairy man harassing' the locals. When I leave I see people lookin' strange at me, huh. Ya'd think they'd never seen a seven foot tall grey man in a suit before.

I leap there, and find Fuzzy, Wendy and a babe all fightin' it out. Then I notice who the babe is that Ishikawa dame from the Oike Gallery in New York. Who knew she had those kinds of moves? the problem is Wendigo is tough. he kept tearing' me and Logan open.

And the chick while fast was startin' to slow down. We tired the Fastball Special, and I miss it. Lucky I get madder. Makin' me stronger, and I finally start hurtin Wendigo while Logan And Ishikawa stab'im in the back .


Then while it reels I hit 'im with a tree.

" Did that do it bub?" The runt asks.

The monster shatters the tree, and yells "Wendigoooo!"

" Nope."

Ana does Somethin' she calls Qi, or Ki, or key. And he's stunned. " Alright Logan let's try the fastball special again!"

" No way !" he growls "Ya missed last time on purpose And I ended up slammed inta those trees I'm gonna be pickin' splinters outta my teeth for weeks!"

I laugh. " Yeah I really did that on purpose, because i really enjoy Wendigo rippin' me apart that's so much fun."

" You idiots!" Ishikawa, grouses. " I can't hold him like this all day! "



I grab Logan and toss him. He goes through Wendy makin' a big Logan sized hole in his chest. Then Wolverine slams into the trees again. " Dammit!" he complains as I chuckle.

Wendigo is down for the count, and I call department H. threy come to secure him, but it seems Logan has called Dr. Strange.The Doc did some kinda mumbo jumbo and Wendigo turned back into his human form. Problem is the spirit is still wanderin' woods waitin' for someone else to possess.

Well don't matter ta me I got my payment for this mess.

A huntin' I will go!

Ok I'll just say one thing i wasn't one of the super villians that helped kill the flash kid. I just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. And yeah I beat up that annoyin' Kon-El but so what?


Now that I got that squared away. Up here in the Big Whilte North Of Canada is the last place i woulda expected to get a job. I mean I didn't come here by choice . Banner was just tryin' to get me out of civilization.

So maybe in a way I owe that Super Brat for getting' Brucie mad and lettin' me out.
Oh yeah the job, Something called Department H Found me after the incident, and offered me twice my normal fee to capture something.

I laugh and say I'm yer man until they tell me it's The Wendigo.



the green hulk fought this thing several times he's tough. Hell once Greenie fought him and Wolverine at the same time.

But ya know I jumped at the opportunity. Because the best way to show the world I'm better than that green doofus is to defeat his ol' enemies and' do it better. But ya know it's weird. After i walk into the woods I find he ain't comin' after me like he usually does.


Well when I say me I mean green Hulk. Don't matter I'm the same guy except fer the fact i gotta brain, so that slobbering drool monster should be after me by now. Then i start thinkin' no way .. could I be he's after someone else ? What a weird coincidence if that runt is out here too.

Guess Instead Of That big furry coming after me I gotta go after it. Well looks like I better start leapin' .

Black mask fixed almost literally

Yeah I know I ain't been that busy in while. It kinda has to do with two things, first That other personality of mine deciding he was going to hold New York hostage Startin' a war.

An' second I kinda been partying with Hercules a lot.

Poor Banner has been wakin' with strange girls an' hangovers heh. But looks like I need ta come back and make some money. What sucks is the first job I got was from a little kid, and it's beat up the Cluemaster, and find Black Mask if he's alive and torture him good thing I got half the money up front.



OK Cluemaster was easy a little too easy, he cried , peed his pants and fainted, so he got the message stop tryin' to take my client's kid. Next I ran around Gotham beating up gangsters and the like until I found out Black mask is back to life, and tryin' to take over Gotham's underworld.

I find his base go through a tidal wave of gangsters and bullets. You know ya'd think when people see that bullets bounce offa me and that all they are doin' is hurting their buddies that they'd stop shooting. Well guess what no they don't.

So a lot of mobsters got hit from "Friendly Fire. "

When I finally catch this girl torturing douche bag I see he's a rip off The Red Skull.

Of course he tries to shoot me, moron. I take him to a place I already set up, for this.

" What are you going to do to me monster?" He yells.

I grin. " I'm gonna torture ya. But I ain't gonna ta use drills , and crap ya did I got more imagination. Abominatrix come in!"


" Raaargh! You no order Abominatrix grey Hulk looking man!" She shouts.


" Yeah, but I wanted ya to meet yer new boyfriend. "

" Snoo Snoo! Snoo Snoo!" The ugly freak shouts.

" She doesn't mean what I think she means?" Black Mask cries.

"Yup!" i turn on a radio with Bon chiccka wow chicka wow music going. While Aboinatrix starts singing, "Abominatrix been feeling fine baby!"


I took a picture when the ugly green thing crushes his ribs, that oughta get me my money As fer the rest ya can't pay me enough to watch what Abominatrix is gonna do to him. If he's lucky he may just get outta this with a crushed pelvis. If not she 'll tear him apart

I don't care either way. Mai Tai's at the bar are on me!

Stupid Greenie

After the Green Hulk Left the Saiyan place. I woke up in a desert. I thought It was Nevada or somethin' and was pretty glad I could just leap over to Vegas, Until I found There was more desert than there usually is when I'm in Nevada.

I later discovered I was in the freakin' Sahara. And then the day came, and I woke up in Latveria. Yup the same Latveria that Doc Doom rules. He wasn't too happy ta see me since last time he saw me and Vegeta captured him after bein' paid by Reed Richards.

So I escape, smashin' most of Doom's defenses, and end up leaping to an area where it's Day time Next thing I know I'm In Antarctica! Damn it! I would get a map for that green moron, but I'm afraid, he'd fold it up , and wear it as a hat.

Gah! How do I get back to Vegas from here?

Hulk Smash Puny Monkey men!

Stupid Capeman! He made fun of Hulk! Told lies about Hulk! And Hulk smashed him good!

But then funny haired Monkey Men jumped on Hulk. They tried to to hurt Hulk but Hulk threw them off! Capeman is gone somewhere. What does Hulk care Hulk has others to Smash!

They try to use their strength on Hulk but Hulk Smashed though them! Then they start running so fast so Hulk Can't see them . And they start beating Hulk. Hulk Use thunder clap And they all fall grabbing there ears. All the rest of people in island try to fight Hulk They were stronger for a while But Madder Hulk get Stronger Hulk become!

One funny hair guy who looks like someone Hulk knows but is taller, and has funny Beard tries to command Hulk to surrender. " Hulk Doesn't know meaning of the word!" Hulk shout.

" So a brave one eh?" He laugh at Hulk.

" No Hulk Doesn't know the meaning of the word but big words will not save you from Hulk!" Hulk hit stupid beard face. Make him cry it was funny. Then these two show up.


" Graar! My family dead kill all!" Yell this guy in black, that wear thunder bolt design. Another one who is weird looking Monkey man Shouts. " You hurt Daddy I'll hurt you!"


These two make Hulk mad. " Are you two making fun of Hulk? Hulk will smash you for that!"

After Hulk beat them down, All the monkey men Blast Hulk. " You think Stupid lights bother Hulk? Puny Monkey Men ! Leave Hulk Alone!!!" Hulk crush ground some fall some fly.

One shoots stupid light into air, and something happens that Hulk doesn't understand, they all turn into big monkeys.





Bah! Doesn't matter! Hulk is still the strongest one there is. One of the big monkeys steps on Hulk. Hulk tosses him off , and grabs his tail. Hulk hits other monkeys with this monkey until his tail falls off , but then Hulk looks around, all monkeys are knocked out Ha! Hulk showed them! Them! And their ugly buildings! No One can beat Hulk! No one is stronger!

Hulk is tired of fighting. Hulk will leap off stupid island with funny hairs that turn into giant monkeys! Hulk will find somewhere that Hulk can be alone.

And now a little destruction

The big Black Bat hired me to cause a little destruction here on Saiyan island.

Saiayn Island kinda sucks. Except they kinds got some Ginger , And Mary Annes Though strangely some of the babes ain't really half bad lookin' once ya get past the whole tail thing.

Meh. I shouldn't just take in the sights I should be doin' some smashin' I'm big like some O' these guys get, so I painted my self flesh color and wore some saiyan armor. I set a few bombs ,on some the buildings they have there, when things start going kablooeyy the finally notice the I don't smell like them.


One of them knock me into the water, and They ae surprised at my grey skin when i come out. " Yeah well ya punks are about to meet the Incredible Hulk!"

I waded into them beating the hell outta them. yeah evreyonce in a while a few would over whelm me, but I'd just get mad, and knock 'im off. Yeah some Of thier blasts hurt, but I heal up quick, then somethin' weird happens I stop gettin' stronger, and start shrinkin'.

The last thing I see before Banner takes over is the sun risin' Dammit ! Not Now... What the? I see my self surrounded by a group of funny haired people. What has the Hulk gotten me into this time?

This Big man that all the others call king stares me over. " So this is the so called Incredible Hulk eh? A skinny mewling human, who's weakness is the sun? Pathetic!"

In my head I hear " Puny Funny Hair! Hulk Will show you to laugh at him!"

No I have to suppress the change! I have no choice but to become Fixit I won't let the other monster out too! Before I think of anything else The King Pokes me with his finger, and I black out last thing I hear is "Hulk will get you for this! Watch out Funny Hair! Hulk will Smash!"

Green Hulk is embarrasin'

Well. My business had been goin' pretty well, in fact I've been hired ta help out in the whole Saiyan Smashin' thing. Now i guessed that Greenie would get jealous, and try yto start his own business, but I didn't think it would be so freakin humilatin'. Here take a look at this commercial I saw last night.





Ugh! Guacamole head! I wish Banner would stop lettin' him out, and I guess I'm gonna have ta pay Spider-Man a visit in the hospital

Well Nightwing.

I guess I can't really be too mad at ya and My cousin Jennifer. Because well I just remembered something that the Green hulk when you were dating the first Batgirl.

Flash back:

" Oooh! Robin Would be so mad if he knew about this!"

"Bah! Hulk doesn't care what grown man wearing way too short shorts thinks!"

" yeah and the way That that alien whore Starfire looks at him who cares what he thanks! Oooh Hulk your so manly!"

"Hulk is manliest one there is!"

End Flashback.

Yeah I'd say we're even .

Meetin' with Stark

Gettin' in ta Stark Tower was easy enough . Most of the security was robots, An I know what they need , a good Smashin'. As fer The Sentry? i found him laying on the kitchen floor cryin' Putz.


I find Stark In his room with with has what looks like Clown Makeup allover his body. And he's on the phone with someone. " Yeah Ollie turns out the bomb was some kind of Joker thing. I found the young lady responsible and punished her justly. That's right Ollie a hard spanking. "

After he hangs up the phone he smugly gets inta bed.

I zap him with some kind of brain mess up ray Koma sold me. it works just fine since when I make my appearance he can't call up the Iron Man Armor, Or Shield. Hell he can barely move or talk.


" Well Ya know Stark, I should kill ya fer all the crap ya did a me with yer Illuminati buddies. Or any number Of things ya pulled during the Civil War. But don't worry You'll live to spread STDS. I'm just here ta give you a warning . Well ya see You and my client have a mutual problem one named Heroslayer."

" Whuuut abouuut him?" Stark tries to say.

" Well my client wants 'em found and dead ASAP we all know he;'s a SHIELD agent. So maybe ya can ferret him out. If not My client will release info that about your little war profiteering during the Civil War.Now how would your Pro Reg Buddies feel about that hmmm?"

He looks down in shame. I grin " So do we understand each other?" He nods. " Oh yeah I say before leavin' Think about how easily I got in here, before ya shoot somebody off into space again, believe me Ya don't wanna a war with the Hulk."

I leap off I guess only time will tell How Stark takes this.

A call from Deathstroke.

It's not often that I go to meet someone about a job but I was curious as to what Deathstroke the Terminator wanted. If it's take out Deadpool it's I'm there. So I wen into this big ass wooden "T" in New york and tried my best to ignore the giant pictures of his kids behind him.



"So Whattya wantin' me to do?" I start when this thing comes running in .

"ME no want to do this! Me cost you lots of money no like Joe Fixit!"



" Ok what is that thing?"

He sighs " That's Match. Go to your room now!"

" Me go to my room.

" How come he ain't goin'? "

" It's complicated. He'll be punished for this later. I was wanting to know how much would it cost for you to have a word with Tony Stark."

" Yer in luck, There's a discount for goin' after Stark. Let's just say we have history. So what's the word? huh?"

Bat Meme!

I'm just a little bored, so here's a meme from Here.

The first one is this.


An' here's another.

Overminded.

I got Vegeta ta follow me in on this last one.

I fought this Overmind guy, back when I was in the Defenders. Well greenie did.Guy's tough. But the two of us should be able to take him. He used his mind powers to hide out in plain site in one of New York's best hotels.

When we go in all the tourists and staff attack us. " The Hell?" Shouts Vegeta. " Out of the way Humans! Or suffer the consequences!"

I thunder clap knocking em all out of the way. " Don't waste yer time on 'em their just pawns any way. All Of them mind controlled. "

" Hmph!" He exclaims. " Let us get this over with." At the penthouse we find our target.



" Hulk! You and your friend are not going to take ,me In! " He declares. " They want to put me in that Negative Zone Prison, while some of the Thunderbolts get put in a Suicide Squad type team. And you Hulk . as as well as you Vegeta have given them their last members, Bullseye , and Venom."

" And ya know this why?" I ask.

" My Mind reading ability. I'll warn you once leave, and you won't get hurt. "

" Bah!" Vegeta declares. " You are the one who has to prepare to be hurt funny hat! "

Before he can make a move I punch him in the face, Damn it! He's in my head! As the Saiyan Prince is knocked away into the skyline from my shot, He puts the thought in my mind that I gotta kill him. Damn it!

Venom

Ya know I thought That the name Venom was familiar. Turns out,I or rather the so called "merged Hulk." fought him before.

So I was expecting a good fight outta this. But Venom looks different now. An' when I found him he was robbin' a bank. Boy how the mighty have fallen. I mean he used to be some kind of vigilante.


Now he's robbin' banks? That's just a big disappointment. " Yo! " I yell. " Hey! Evil Spider- Man! Yer gonna go back inta custody rather ya like it or not!"


He leaps over me. Dodges, my hay maker then webs me up. Ugh! I keep gettin' suits ruined this way.

Ugh! This stuff sticks worse than than Spider-man's stuff. And it tears my shirt pullin' off. Why do I even bother? Good news is the Bounty I get fer venom will give me enough money to get another one.

The problem is he slashes through my chest with claws. Man! This is gettin' a little tiresome. How many clawed guys are out there? " We don't know who you are Grey man! But You will pay for interfering with us!" Venom slobbers.

I notice the guy's voice kinda sounds like I heard it before, and I don't mean from Venom. Is there a different guy in this costume? Don't matter, I Feint a blow, that he dodges, and I catch him with a right, knocking him inta the bank vault.


He shrugs it off. "The last guy in who was attached to the symbiote, took punches from the Juggernaut!" He gurgles. " Your shots aren't even going to affect me buddy! No one short of the Hulk can hurt me!"


Heh. That makes me grin there. Given I am the Hulk. He leaps on me and lands a right cross on me jaw. Each punch after hurts a little less. Until I grab him by the neck and slam ugly into the pavement.

when he gets up I punt him into a teller's desk. I then pick up the vault door he tore up and slam him with it. I laugh. " What was that about me not bein' able ta hurt ya?"

She shreds the steel door. Kicks me in the jewels then starts webbing me in a
cocoon. The stuff starts gettin' in my mouth, and nose. Ok All this just gets me madder.

I tear through the gunk, and growl " Yer goin' down toothy!"

He looks scared for a second then tries to jump at me again. I thunder clap, and the suit starts meltin' and the guy inside screams.

" So That's yer weakness eh?" I smile.


" Kill You!" He mumbles at the edge of conciseness.

" Nah! But ya do getta free song If yer happy and ya know it Clap yer hands!" Thoom!

" Arrrgh! " Venom shrieks.

" If yer happy and ya know it, then yer face will surely show clap yer hands!"

Thoom!
Thoom!
Thoom!
Thoom!

All the claps. put him down. and the symbiote melts offa the guy Ah man! I though I recognized the guy's voice! It's Mac Gargen The Scorpion! So I was fightin' Venom lite.

While I shake my head in disgust. The oozing thing gets up and tries to attach itself to me.

I try pullin' it off that ain't happenin'. So outta desperaation I thunder cllap right in front of my face. I keep doin' it until the alien falls off and gathers in a puddle, at my feet.

That was too close a call. I call in SHIELD, and weirdly they let the suit rebond with Gargen, and before puttin' him in shackles. Eh what do I care? I got my money.

A lame ThunderBolt

Not really lame I guess If yer Deadpool or sumthin'. The guy in question is the Taskmaster.


His power is he can copy any kind of movements a person does. Like karate kicks, and stuff. So He can pretty much do all the stuff that Daredevil. Hawkeye, Capitan America, and others can do.

And he has the misfortune to fight me.

Everyone should pretty much know what my powers are by now, but in case yer livin' under a rock or somethin. I guess I'll tell ya. I'm strong real strong. Madder I get stronger I become.

I heal fast. Even faster than Wolverine. Also I'm pretty hard to hurt. I won't even go itna the ghost seein' thing. Ok so I tracked him down to his lair . Took down his cannon fodder students.

And we begun fightin'. Well Ya can't really call it a fight. he jumped me, used a bunch of chop saki moves. And he smacked in the face with his shield. Though he used moves from Captian America the shield was made of aluminum or something and dented on my face.

I knocked him out by hittin' him with my middle finger. Yup that was it all there was too it. A pretty easy night's work. It took about fifteen minutes . I think I'll spend the rest of the night in some casinos do some recreational gambling with the money I made.

I hope the next One I fight gives a challenge. Some mook named Venom.

Strikin' back at Deathstrike.

I gotta tip that she's hooked up with the Hand. Whelp I'm goin' there by plane in a route that's night the whole way So I don't have to worry about, changin' to Banner.

After the plane lands I get ta work, finally findin' The Hand Temple after a couple O' hours. And guess who I find inside? Yup Deathstrike.

" Who are what are you? what do you want?" She asks.

" Name's Joe Fixit ,girl. You gotta jail sentence waitn' for ya stateside."

" It will keep on waiting Gajin!" She screeches, slashin' through my chest.

" Aw man Another shirt one!" I say "Oh well I can buy another one offa the bounty for you!"

She cuts me a few more times. I knock her away an' start throwin' things at her.

" Ya can't slash me from far off ! But I can use my power at long range!"

She starts laughing. " You don't study up on your targets do you behemoth?" Her arms stretch out an' go through my guts. Damn adamantium. I grab her arms and Pull 'im outta my chest.

Then I slam her into a pillar she's nice and knocked out. Then a buncha ninjas jump me. Ninjas against me ? Yeah right! I rub them offa me , like bugs. All those swords, knives, and sticks, just annoyed me.

Then some chick In red threatens me.

" I am Elektra leader of the Hand. Leave now Creature, and you can leave with your life!"

I smile " Don't know who ya talkin' to do ya hon?"

" No. Apparently neither do you. Or you would know the Hand is allied with dark forces. This thing appears from no where a weird lookin' demon. It shots me with some kinda Hand blast thing that makes me feel all cold inside .

It then drags me into the shadows



Elektra laughs as the creature does Telling Fixit what it's going to do him, and his soul. Her joy turns to confusion , as the Monster starts screaming. She's horrified when it comes limping out then returns to the smoke from whence it came.

" How No one is that strong..."

I come out of there healin' from the demon damage. " I am I'm the strongest one there is."

The girl's eyes go wide as she realizes just who I am. " I-impossible." She mumbles. Deathstrike who just recovered tries to rip me again.

" What I can't cut you?" She exclaims. " But I did so a while a go."

I grin." I'm madder now. " I knock her out with my index finger.

Girl in red tries to sound threatening again." You may have won this time!But You have made powerful enemies, even more powerful than the monster you pretend to be!"

" Yeah yeah I heard that before Lady!" I turn an' all of them but Death strike are gone. well. I take Deathstrike to the local SHIELD office. I get my money,an' head for home.

Yup, 'm gonna be celebratin' with this money. I'll even invite Kristy to make up for missin' this wedding thing.

I gotta hole in my wall

I've been livin' by myself here fer some time , and I ain't gotta hole in my wall from myself or the normal fightin' I do. but Ya know I let Vegeta , and that runt Logan stay here durin' the their time In Vegas the race.

That was a mistake that caused the aforementioned hole in my freakin' wall. Looks like that whore Draculina sent the Trunk Boys after me. Ya wanna know what's up between us?

Well ok. Ya see The Vegas PD every once in a while pays me when a super powered threat shows up. Well I could never prove it but She was drainin' patrons at that skin bar of their blood.

Not that I really need legal authorization to take her out. Which I did . Problem is with those damned Draculonains they keep comin' back. ( I mean Vlad And your sister Vampi yer alright.)

Well from what I hear Vegeta beat his kids, and sent ' em home. I wouldn't know since this happened during the day. I had Banner on so many sedatives that ww3 couldn't wake him up.

Hey he knew the rules quit tryin' ta cure himself , and he gets freedom. Well he violated ' em and now I don't let 'im have freedom. Well I here Wolverine was useless as usual. The runt slept 'till noon.

So I get vegeta ta pay me back by helpin' take down the last of the Thunder bolts after he gets outta the race.

Fade to Grey

When last we left The incredible Hulk in Kodiak's blog the emerald man monster was recipient of a punch so mighty it rocked the town of Vegas The Hulk was knocked into space then he crashed to the planet creating a huge crater.

Watch True believers as The Hulk gets up in a rage, but then he notices The sun set.

" No! Not fair! Hulk wanted to smash Him. Not...."

The behemoth falls then transforms into The smaller , but meaner Joe Fixit.


" Man I don't know what Kodiak's beef with greenie, But when I beat That mutie, People are gonna stop comparing' me to Salad Brain. "

I leapt around the city 'till I find 'im . " Hey Red ! Don't look now! " He turns. " I said Don't look now!" I plow intro 'im with my feet.

He slashes my chest. " Hulk is that you?"

" What? Just because I'm grey , and have more than a ten word vocabulary people just assume I ain't the Hulk. Here let show ya I am. " I unleash a haymaker on his jaw that lands him, on some billboard That has this kid eating cereal.

He the thing he hit was the spoon part, and it bent back and flipped him across skyline into a fountain In front of a casino. He spits out water and replies " Yup your the Hulk alright."


I jump in an' put his head under the water. He gets bigger, and tosses me off . He charges me I duck a clothes line , give him a shot in the ribs . His massive forearms grab my neck, and he starts chokin' me out. I pick him up and suplex Kody into a car.

When he gets up I poke one of his eyes with my index finger while he's recovering I elbow him in the head. As he gets to his knees I kick him Makin ' a huge trench through the strip.

The big man heals. " What the? He's somehow tricky all the sudden? I guess that more than his skin color changed. "

I jump Over to him. " Ya got that right sucker!" Too bad for me He sinks his claws into my gut. It'll take a second to heal, less if I get really mad. Still I gotta He ain't gonna give me that second.. I tear a A hole into the pavement and fall into the sewers beneath.

He follows me. " Hiding? This isn't like you Hulk!"

" I aint't hidin' I just wanna show you that gas mane!" I pop out behind him and toss him into it. It explodes just like I counted on . I crawl out into the night. I notice a bunch O' clouds are blocking out the moon. Great That means I'm gonna get even stronger and have less of Banner's wimpy influence. Well that and I'm pretty ticked. I heal almost instantly.

Kodiak springs out of the hole Healing from the third degree burns. " I'm going to kill you!" He screams. He grabs my hands Then we're in a classic test of of strength. He keeps getting bigger, but When he actually gets strong enough to hurt me I get madder , and match him.

We're doing this for thirty few minutes, when I finally just decide to knee him in the groin. While he's howling I say. " Hey Looks like ya need to put some water on those wounds of yers. How about I send ya over to one of my favorite watering holes? "


I punch him into a strip club I sometimes bounce for. When I find him his wounds , and burns are gone. He grabs me by the neck and it looks like he may break it when he notices all the nude women around him.


This distraction is all I need to grab his face , and toss him through the roof. He lands just where I want him the construction site him , and Gucamole Skin fought at earlier.

Kodiak, Tosses a crane at me. The heavy machinery crumbles burying me. Now most people would either be dead or trapped. Most people ain't the Incredible Hulk. I bust outta the wreckage, with a wrecking ball on a chain. The machine had on it.

I smack The giant with it in the face a few times. He catches it, and crushes it in his bear hands ( That ain't a typo just a bad pun.) I realize what comin' next, and I roll with the blow. Leaping backwards into to the perfect position.

" Alright Red ! No more playin' now I'm just gonna stand here, an' the two of us are gonna slug it out! C'mon ~! Whattya waitin' for? Chicken?"

That got 'im he roared and ran at me with a full head of stem, To bad I side stepped hit him in the back Of the had , and knocked him just where I wanted him.

" What what is this? " Shouts Kodiak.

" Wet cement ." I grin. " Gettin' a sinkin' feelin' there Kody? Well I guess you'll be at the bottom in a few minutes. Then as your strugglin' It'll start to harden until your in a rock coffin. Give Jimmy Hoffa my regards. "

As his head goes under I laugh. Than I realize nobody's payin' me for this. Damn !